[So So Sad]

My boyfriend of a year and a half is 30 yrs old. We are both young and attractive people who fell in love and now live together. When we first started dating I was thrilled, until we finally made love. He couldn't keep his erection and I instantly thought but did not say out loud "what did I do wrong?" Sadly this has happened many times through out our relationship. Once I said something he ensured me it wasn't my fault. He claims to be a very active athlete (he trains wrestling two, maybe three days a week). We have sex about once a week and I've expressed to him that I wish it were more but he says he must save his energy for training. Often when I try to make love to him I can't get him to have an erection. Then when we do have sex he doesn't want me to move, if I put any effort into it he loses his erection. He used a rubber cock ring during intercourse maybe twice when we first started dating but he mostly seems to reserve the rings and lubricant for masturbation only (he has a large collection hidden in his dresser). He's affectionate and swears that he's very attracted to me, often stating that "sex isn't everything". In all the relationships I’ve been in I have never experienced this problem and it’s really starting to take a toll on me. I’ve tried talking to him about this but he always gets defensive and says it’s because he’s such an athlete. So I’m finally reaching out for help. Thank you