[stillsexxy]

Hello All,
At this point I'm desperate. I've been married for 15years and we have 2 great kids and I have one from a previous relationship. My husband is 10 years older than I am. I believe my husband was suffering from ED in his mid 20's. While we were dating for 9mons we never had sexual realtions. I thought he was being a gentelmen especially since I had a toddler at the time and my ex left me soon after the birth of our child. We finally had sex on our wedding night I thought ok maybe because we had been drinking and were tired things weren't exactly right. Fast forward to the present, I think we've been intimate 5 times in the last 12 years. Does anyone have any advise for me. I do love my husband but he won't talk about it and refuses to see a Doctor. As a result, I've blamed myself and I've gain over 50lbs since being married to him. I'm hoping the bigger I get the less I'll want to be close to him and we can stay married if only on paper.

[anette]

This is very sad. I think in part you are punishing yourself and also compensating for your lack of intimacy with food. Been there - done that. Maybe you could try focusing on yourself, a workout program and exercise program. If he will not seek help you just end up making yourself crazy thinking about it. My story is almost exactly the same as yours including the timeframe minus the kids. I am much more relaxed now that I have my own bedroom. Before, going to bed was a nightmare, the dread, the desire for intimacy, that failure for it to occur. No my bedroom is a place of sanctuary and peace - I am taking better care of myself, although the failure of achieving intimacy in this marriage still hurts everyday.

Good luck.

[olympian86]

still sexy please show this to your husband. Sir, take this serious. I am sure you wife and family are worth every effort you can put forth to save this most cherrished part of you relationship. please see a doctor and talk about your feelings. she is there for you. what will you do when she closes the door and says, i would rather do with out since "it" is not good, and so can you! my spouse is so far gone because we mismanaged my deal. we did not talk openely, i thought all was fine. i just thought she was not interested in long term sex, not true. since then we were never on the same sheet of music. i took drugs she was not interested, no more durgs, she gets interested, and ole unfaithful was exactly that. help is there seek help and work together. dont let pride and a hurt heart with low selfesteem get in the way. wish my wife was as supportive but now i fight an up hill battle. I believe in miracles and she does not, go figure. my situation is with God now, you still have control TAKE IT, your helpmate needs you and so do the children.